Monday, February 14, 2011

Redhead Jokes

My mother sent these to me in an e-mail.I have no idea where they came from, but I found them highly amusing and thought I'd share.

Q. How do you get a redhead's mood to change?
A. Wait 10 seconds.

Q. What do you call a redhead with an attitude?
A. Normal.

Q. How can you tell when a redhead has been using a finicky computer?
A. There's a hammer embedded in the computer monitor.

Q. Why aren't there more redhead jokes?
A. Someone made the mistake of telling them to a redhead.

Q. What is the difference between a redhead and a terrorist?
A. You can negotiate with a terrorist.

Q. How do you get a redhead to argue with you?
A. Say something...

Q. What’s safer: a redhead or a piranha?
A. The piranha. They only attack in schools.

Q. Why do redheads really like their hair color?
A. It does the same thing for the men it does for the bulls.

Q. Why didn't Indians scalp redheads?
A. They knew better.

Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A. A redhead.

Q. How do you know when your redhead has forgiven you?
A. She stops washing your clothes in the toilet bowl.

Q. How many redheads does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. One -- she holds the bulb while the world revolves around her.

Q. What's the difference between a redhead and a barracuda?
A. Nail polish.

Q. What's the difference between a redhead and a pit bull?
A. The pantsuit.

Q. What do redheads make for dinner?
A. Reservations.

Q. What's black-and-blue and lies on the sidewalk?
A. A guy who tells too many redheaded jokes.

Q. Why is it better to date a blonde than a redhead?
A. You can ignore a blonde safely.

Q. How do you remember a redhead's birthday?
A. Forget it once.

Q. How is a redhead like a tennis racquet?
A. They're both high-strung.

Q. What do redheads and razor-wire have in common?
A. Handle both with care.

Q. Why do guys date blondes?
A. All the redheads are taken.

Pretty sure none of these apply to me. ;P